A Little Arizona Sunshine

I'm just trying to make sense of all the thoughts and feelings going through my heart right now. Monday late afternoon, Donny ran into the street in town and was hit by a car. I wasn't prepared for something like this. I know he was just a dog, an animal, but he was the one thing I've taken care of and poured my love into. The furry guy that greeted me with so much love every single time I came home (no matter if only 5 minutes had passed since I'd left...). My thoughts might be scrambled, but here they are: I know I can't blame myself, but that's all I've been doing since he was hit. Why did I sleep in? Why couldn't I have gotten his food from Joe the night before and fed him in the morning like normal? Why did I feel like I needed to go to town right then? Why did I place my needs over the one I was taking care of? Why why why. Or What if? Or If only. These are things I'm starting to realize other people ask when they lose something. A jo

Last night I led out in a vespers program and this morning I led in the main portion of Sabbath School.  One thing I've been learning here is humility. It's so easy to think you're great at everything when you work with young people that appreciate what you appreciate.  But what if they don't care? What if no matter how great the talk or how interesting the activity -- ultimately they don't care?  It breaks my heart that they don't care about spiritual things. It hurts to think about how they view God. But something else creeps in -- pride. I tend to think, "I am boring. I look incompetent to the teachers around me. I used to be good at this type of thing." When in reality--the word "I" shouldn't even be in my thought process. I've been learning about the role and the power of the Holy Spirit and it has been such a relief and burden lifter in my life. It is HIS responsibility to convict and convert hearts--not mine. What a blessing.